Once your abusive ex finds a new supply after discarding you, they won’t just keep quiet and enjoy the new relationship; instead, what they will do is flaunt their new catch. While you’re struggling to find closure and move on, they’re already reveling in their new relationship, seemingly carefree with their new partner.
They may showcase this through frequent updates, photos, and declarations of love on social media, engage in excessive public displays of affection, especially in places where people who know you can see or where you might come across them. They might shower the new supply with excessive gifts or vacations, introduce them to your family and friends, and more. If you haven’t yet understood the cycle of abuse (honeymoon phase, devaluation, discard), or even if you’re aware but haven’t healed those wounds, seeing your narcissistic ex flaunting their new relationship can be especially hurtful. So, why do they excessively flaunt their new supply?
Fragile Ego
Narcissists often display their new supply to satisfy their fragile sense of self-esteem and ego. A narcissist heavily relies on external validation and attention to maintain that façade of being superior and important. When they excessively flaunt their new partner, it allows them to present a picture of desirability and success. It simply shows they’ve left a relationship and found someone new, implying they are still someone who is ‘loved’ and admired by others.
This fragile ego is further reinforced when those around them congratulate them for their new relationship, highlighting how they’ve landed a good partner, which in turn feeds into their need for superficial attention. A narcissist has a low capacity to handle negative emotions, which are triggered when they’re not admired or validated. So, they feed on the validation and admiration they get from the environment as a way to escape their suppressed overwhelming emotions.
Devaluing You
The reason a narcissist shows off their new partner is often to hurt you. They want to make it seem like they’re doing better without you and that they “won” after the breakup, especially if you were the one who ended things. It’s like they’re saying, “Look, I’ve moved on to someone amazing, and you’re missing out.” This is meant to make you feel regret and pain, kind of like rubbing salt in the wound. It’s their way of trying to show they’re in control and that breaking up with them was a mistake. In simple terms, they’re trying to mess with your feelings and make themselves look better.
Love Bombing
The narcissist may also show off their new supply excessively as part of their love bombing strategy. The same way they might have showered you with excessive displays of affection in your past relationship is the same thing they’re doing to their new catch. It’s the beginning of a new relationship, and they want to lock in their new partner. They are trying to make the new victim look like they’ve won the lottery, leaving nothing to hide, especially considering they’ve already been introduced to their friends and family.
Conclusion
A narcissist will do a lot of things to get to you or to get their needs met, but you can also do yourself a great service and work on breaking free from these patterns. It’s not just the narcissist you need to be worried about; the concerning thing should be why you haven’t worked on the pain or what you are doing to avoid finding yourself attracting the predictable and familiar patterns in your life. It may be easy to understand the whys of the narcissist or your abusive ex, but that’s the path that will yield minimal fruits in your healing journey. The path that will be more productive in your healing journey is the path of finding healing and processing your unhealed wounds. It’s about challenging who you think you are so that you can finally see who you truly are.
Note from the Author
If you’re ready and you’d like my help with healing, finding peace in life and breaking free from these toxic patterns, then you can book a FREE BREAKTHROUGH CALL with me HERE. Happy healing 💙💙. Feel free to share and comment! Use this information with caution, it comes from my own thoughts & bias, experiences and research😊.
References
1. https://unfilteredd.net/why-do-narcissists-show-off-their-new-supply/
